I Am Not Perfect: Probelm With Giving Advice

Sometimes your advice will be used against you :/ and you will feel as if you were a hypocrite.  I just want to say I am not PERFECT at taking my own advice....I dont look at my blog posts as advice but more as motivators and reminders!As As a blogger, my posts are meant to remind myself along with others. Just because I write this stuff it does not mean I am perfect at practicing.
I try, but I am not perfect, I am an insan-I forget.

 I use these posts as a reminder to work on my own weakness. I dont want anyone to think ooo she is so good when they read my posts, because most of the posts I write are a result of a probelm I am dealing with and its as if writting the post helps me find a solution that I want to practice.

For an example I wrote a post titled Allah Alone-Ya Allah! Express Yourself to Him Alone...I have not reached the point in my life in which I am able to 'express myself to Him alone" but the post is meant to motivate me to reach that state of mind...it is a reminder for my ownself and it is a goal I set for myself...lots of my posts are meant to be like that. Another example is the E.Fahymoui notes, just because I am re-writting the notes it does not mean I have already put into practice what I have been taught, it is a slow process in which you devlop these skills, and you practice what you learn.

 I am only a student of knowledge who is slowly putting my knowledge into practice, the more knowledge I gain the mor easier it will become to put it into action inshAllah.

I am not perfect.

Looks Do Count-Value (Marraige)

 For the  past couple of weeks i have been hearing of comments about changing the

way you look/act (outter) so you can get married.

All I can think is I thought it was character that counts?

This may sound  like a  generalized thought, but it seems if looks do make up a great part of your "Value" when it comes to marriage.

In my opinion this whole looks do count is a serious problem because it is small comments about the way we look which affects our confidence, this is why girls refuse to wear loosely and no-makeup because no doubt comments about looks has had an impact on their confidence.

 Sometimes when people comment on the way I dress I think oh so you are trying to telling me I should dress in a more attractive way just to get married?At the same time I think hey maybe they are right if I wear those tight clothes, makeup, change my scarf style, and etc no doubt I would attract more guys but is that what I want my value to be in?  

What happen to character- is this not apart of our value?

The reality is sometimes, or maybe most of the times looks outweigh everything else...

I dont even want to finish writing this post because of how annoyed I am, but heres a quote from my favorite book-Dont Be Sad which wil make you think twice about what makes your value

"Therefore your value is in your abilities, good deeds, manners, and contributions to society. Do not feel grief over that which has passed you by in life in terms of good looks, wealth, or family; and be content with what Allah has allotted you"

See thats what  I thought but then I started to heard these comments, but humdAllah I came across this quote right after I started to think about this whole concept of  how your looks contribute alot to your value...

"If you are a seeker of enjoyment, be satisfied with the looks Allah has favored you with..."

I Will....Liar!

I will___________________

-give you this - get you that  - send you this

-take you here -visit you -call you back

- help you -buy you this -come

I will...?

How many times have you heard someone say I WILL, and then you only wait and see that they never did...what do you think of this person? Dont say I will if you feel you are incapble of performing the task, because this statement of I will is seen as a form of promiss, and they one who breaks the promiss is seen as a liar.

Aisha said, " The prohet hated nothing more than lying. If he found out someone was lying he would lose his respect until he has repented"

If the this is the state of mind of our Prophet, I dont find it wrong to be upset when I feel someone has lied to me. The lies of people always remain in the back of my head for some reason, I cant forget if you told me I will and you did not...I dont know if this is bad, but I think I have the right to remeber..?

Dont tell someone I WILL if you dont have the sincere intention to do that thing, and make sure to always add inshallah, or if you are not really sure you can then just say I WILL TRY.

This makes a big difference. I despise people who lie and forget about their promises. The worst part is you cant really confront a person on these matters because they will return only anger, unless they are very patient then you will probably  have a calm reaction.

One of the characterstic tics of the hypocrite that the Prophet described is

"when he made a covenant he acted treacherously"

Be careful when you make a covenant with someone, because if you break it you may fall into this hadith, dont be of the one who says "yes I will" and then forget, this make you be seen as a liar.

The other characteristic in this hadith is "when he talked he lied"

Once you say I will and you dont, the other person may see you as a liar...

Allah Alone-Ya Allah!Express Yourself To Him

"Truly there in your heart there is a void which annot be removed exccpet with the company of Allah.And in it there is a sadness that cannot be removed excpet with the happiness of knowing Allah and being true to Him. There is an emptiness that cannot be filled excpet with love for Him and by turning to Him and always rembering Him. And if a person were given all of the world and what is in it it would not fill this emptiness" -Ibn Alqayim via Dont Be Sad book

 Turn to Allah instead, and open up your heart to Him alone: what an amazing state of mind, I wish I can achieve inshallah,  open your heart up to Allah, and you will never regret expressing yourself-

Sometimes Sabr and silence is better than expressing how you really feel -HalfOurDeen

 Allah would never make you feel down. He answers your duaa in the way that is best for you, He LOVES when you run to Him in tears! He wants you to turn to Him.

" If you come to a test where you have no friend other then Allah than know that you

have the greatest gift" -Dr.Shadee AlMasry

"When we are broken-hearted or down we have to look at this as a gift, because this is a chance to go to Allah:dont go to people when you are sad, go to Allah. The closest to Allah are the ones who are the most broken. Its easy to turn to Allah when you are broken in this world"

No doubt it is easier to turn to Allah when you are broken in this world, when dunya is going well you dont really think as much about turning to Allah, this is stated in the Quran:30:33

And when harm touches men, they cry sincerely only to their Lord (Allah), turning to Him in repentance, but when He gives them a taste of His Mercy, behold! a party of them associate partners in worship with their Lord.

Yasmine Mogheds article "Why do people have to leave each other" explains exctally the feelings I felt all these years, but I fail to do what she has done and this is to realize that

"To attain that state, don’t let your source of fulfillment be anything other than your relationship with God. Don’t let your definition of success, failure, or self-worth be anything other than your position with Him (Qur’an, 49:13). And if you do this, you become unbreakable, because your handhold is unbreakable. You become unconquerable, because your supporter can never be conquered. And you will never become empty, because your source of fulfillment is unending and never diminishes."

Oh Allah please make it easy for me to always turn to you Alone and remeber you!

Muslims Love Love: Page Views

I didnt think I would get that many viewers on my blog: 1888 views :o...

Thanks to my marriage post which has 720 views ever since  I potsed it on Tuesday.... lol thats how you know its a hot topic!! Also thanks to Half Our Deen which posted it on their FB, and of course only through Allah has this blog reached all of these viewers worldwide (I LOVE seeing the little map which shows my readers from all these different countries!) I wish I can visit all of these countries! Inshallah

http://hudawritess.blogspot.com/2012/05/marriage-efforts-approaching-him.html

Sample of the cool map! (Other countries also on list like Finland and Belgium I didnt even know there was Muslims there!!! Subhnallah our ummah is HUGE!)

United States 309 United Kingdom 148 Malaysia 84 Canada 66 Australia 45 Singapore 27 India 26 Pakistan 24 United Arab Emirates 19 South Africa 15

Surah AlRahman-Favorite

Did I ever mention how much I love Surat AlRahman?

Surah Rahman - Beautiful and Heart trembling Quran recitation by Syed Sadaqat Ali

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hod05lHgsMg

I Like him! Marriage, Efforts, & Approaching him

How many times have you heard the following statement:

"I like him, but how do I tell him?!"
 (halal way-with marriage intention)

You like this amazing guy, or possibly just admire him, you see him everywhere you go, or maybe that one time at that event, and you notice he has everything your looking for, or thats what you thought, you want to tell him, but you cant, you want to start a conversation in a non-haram way, should you CC your dad in an email, add him on facebook, or should you tell his best friend, ? You really want to get your message across, but you dont know what to do.

What type of efforts should you put alongside with your duaa?

How do we approach marriage?

No one knows....because there is no one answer fits all for this type of situation..

All I know for now is that you can make some duaa, and Inshallah if Allah wants it He will make it happen, but at the same time I was taught that with duaa, you must put in effort.

I was taught by I.Elfahymoui that,

1.Pre-requisites to get the help of Allah you have to put effort first

2. Do everything in your power to get what you seek, if you prepare correctly you will get it.

3.If you want something good in this dunya then put forth towards it.

4.Istkhara is a form of tawkal, you dont pray it with doubts.
5.Tawkal is not the idea of giving up, it is a proactive attuide. It is the attuide of 'Il will go full esteem ahaed and I will not worry.Push forward all you have and if there are roadblocks dont worry. Allah opens up the way for those who have yaqn (Certanity).

So you cant just make duaa that Allah will get you married to this amazing guy, you have to put effort right? And you have to have tawkal (trust),yaqn(certanity) and make salaat istghara ?

So you want that amazing guy? You really want to marry him? Make tawkal, and go full-esteem ahead! But how? You want to keep it halal, you dont want to break the muhram rule!
http://hudawritess.blogspot.com/2012/03/protect-me-baba-guardian-rule.html
 

The question is in the siution of approaching marriage,
what type of halal efforts should we put in?

 

Im sure you have meet someone with the same question

  I have heard of alot of stories about this whole "how do I approach him" kind of issue.

 No doubt telling someone you like them is one of the most exciting but hardest things
to do and how do you do it without displeasing Allah?
 

There are so many stories  of Muslims goin through this journey to find thier spouse, there is no "one way" to find your spouse, there is no "one person" to go to if you are interested in him, there is no prescribed way on how to "put efforts".

The most you can do for now in the most halal way is make duaa.

Coping Skills In Islam

Islam teaches us the best coping skills

If you read my last post, I decided its time for me to do daily reading again, since the semester is over, and humdallah last night I found this book answering all of my feelings for the past week.

(Black quotes from the book:Dont Be Sad)

"Do not expect gratitude from anyone"

This chapter relates to one of my posts I posted about four days ago, about gratitude...its quite similar I love the way the author explained it he writes,

"So be at peace if you are requited with ungratefulness for the good you have done. Rejoice in your knowledge that you will be rewarded from the One who has unlimited treasures at His disposal."

What a great state of mind! Inshallah gona always keep this in mind when I feel as if people have not been thankful.

"..most human beings are ungrateful to thier Lord, so what treatment should you and I expect?"

Subhnallah, sad but true...

"Doing Good To Others Gives Comfort to the Heart"

This was a great chapter to read as I was preparing myself to go help out Taybah mother of  the three handicapped girls-helpourgirls.com

"Furthermore, the psychological benefits that one receives from helping others are indeed great. If you suffer from depression, an act of charity will have a more potent effect on your sickness than will the best available medicine"

I never thought of charity as a remedy, love this!

"Repel Boredom With Work"

One of the reasons why I choose to start reading again is because I felt like after school ended I was wasting my time doing nothing (I gota admit I still waste it) I really needed to read this..

"When you find yourself to be idle, prepare for depression and despair, because idleness allows your mind to wander in the past, future, with all of their difficulties. Therefore my sincere advice to you is to perform fruitful acts instead of being idle"

Being idle is not good for the brain, thats true!

"Pre-Ordainment"

This chapter just hit my brain in the perfect spot, I reallly needed to read the following

"Whatever has befallen you was not meant to escape you, and whatever has escaped you was not meant to befall you:If this belief were to be firmly ingrained in your heart, then all hardship and difficulty would become ease and comfort. For this reason do not feel overly troubled if you are afflicted with sickness, the death of a son, or a loss in wealth. Allah has decreed these matters. You will never completely feel at ease until you firmly believe that Allah has already pre-ordanined all matters"

I think I read this chapter the last time I read the book, because I always remeber that quote about whatever has befallen you...

humdallah it does keep you going

Convert a Lemon Into A Sweet Drink

Islam gives us remedies for everything, the Prophet is our psychologists as E.Fayhmoui once said, no need for pills, just a proper understanding of Allah Inshallah. Islam has taught me a great lesson for life: coping skills...no matter what anyone says, theres nothing like the coping skills

Allah has taught us in the Quran how, one of them is...

Therefore do thou hold Patience,- a Patience of beautiful (contentment).

"If you have found Him, the you have found everything. And if you lose your faith in Him, then you have lost everything. If you are persistent and sincere in your supplication, you wil achieve freedom from worry and anxiety. If you are living through affliction, remember Allah, call out His name, and ask Him for help. Place your forehead on the ground and mention His praises, so you can obtain TRUE freedom"....

Inshallah we are of those who always turn to Allah in every moment of our lives, and we find comfort when turning to Him, especially when in times of hardships.

Dont Be Sad-Book

My favorite book ever! "Dont be sad by Aidah Ibh Abduallah AlQarni

I actually first read excperts from this book during H.S in my Islamic Studies class, but at that time I was just a silly student who didnt really care about what the teacher was trying teach us..and then during college at an ICPC event, Yusuf Estes was doing a live show for his "Gudiance TV " channel, and he said he recomnded this book to a non-Muslim and she became Muslim after, I got my copy the same day!

If you didnt read it, your living a hard life because this book teaches you how to deal with moments of sadness,depression, hardships, and etc. You can read it for free as an ebook here

http://www.dont-be-sad-alqarni.com/

I almost finished it once, and then I gave it to a friend to give it to her non-muslim classmate who sounded interested in Islam-he read the Quran..

 

Diversity Walk



The shirt I refused to wear -it was hot!

So I was right, I was the only hijabi at the diversity walk well there was other one ONE (or two dk). Humdallah Im thankful that I had the opprtuntity to represent Muslims, after all it is a walk aimed towards "diversity".  I walked with some professors from my College, which was nice but awkward lol..inshallah next time I want to get a whole group of Muslims to go...gota say that walk was long 3miles, but beautiful views of the water and the statue of liberty-the symbol of freedom.

The way there was also nice, I was cruising on "Freedom Road" with Maher Zains song "Freedom"..ironic huh?



Statue of Liberty-Freedom!

My Birthday

Today is my birthday, and it will be the only time the digits of my age match the day..On May 20,2012 I became 20,and yesterday was the last day I spent as a teenager, and it will also be the only day where I was 19 on May 19th 2012...cool right!! Lol

Also this is probably the first birthday in which I was able to particpate in a good cause, yesterday I was volunteering at an Islamic Relief fundraiser for Palestine, and today Inshallah I will attend the "Jersey City Diversity Stride"

Although its kind of embrassing that noone is really going to come along (even though i told my friends thats all I want for my bday) humdallah, as long as I am represneting the Muslims, I defintlly dont mind going alone! I always end up meeting great new people when Im alone-social skills.

http://2012diversitystride.kintera.org/faf/search/searchTeamPart.asp?ievent=993658&lis=0&kntae993658=0B4669D352C745BD8A32C18CDD9B5884&supId=0&team=5057680&cj=Y

Anyways, AlhumdAllah, I want to thank Allah for the amazing life He has given me and inshallah He only contunies to send His blesssings upon me, and always guide me,

"Ya muqalab alqulb tabaat quluban alya dynak"

Private Messages:From Allah To You

"Good reminders ussually hit you in the heart, as if they were meant for you.

As if Allah just sent you a private message to awaken your heart" <3

This has to be one of my favorite quotes, I memorized it, and I try to apply it to my life all the time, I feel like im always experiencing what is descirbed in this quote. I commented on this quote on my old blog, and I want to write a new story about it.

It seems like every time I have a problem, Allah places me in the "right place at the right time". Ill end up in a lecture discussing exctally what I am feeling, and the solution I need. It is an answer to my duaa, and sometimes I dont even make duaa but Ill still find myself with a
solution-answer-message-reminder.Humdallah!!!

So remember Me; I will remember you.

 And be grateful to Me and do not deny Me. 2:152

I have so many stories to tell of this quote, but I will talk about todays Jumaah, and last jumaah.

Last jumaah, I went to pray in Jersey City, I was undecided on where to go, but I went there...

I dont recall what the jumaah was about (and thats why I always wonder if we can take notes!) but all I know is right after I was telling my friends 'HE ANSWERED MY QUESTIONS" I was so excited and I thought of this quote =D

Today I went to Hackensak for jumaah, to give out fliers about some Islamic Relief event, I usually dont go  there much because the arabic of the shiekh is a little more difficult to understand, but today they had like this amazing english speaking sheikh!

His lecture was about "Ihsan" and how the best dawah is thorugh ihsan-good manners and kindness..he also said the word "Silent Dawh" all I can think is I thought I made that term up!

He also said, "Let them know the Commander before the commandments"

He also said something beautiful which made me realize what I was doing was wrong... 'Almumin (beleiever) has to be easy with people"..it sounded better in arabic, but basically the true believer is the one who people get along with easily...

Prior to the khutbah, I was in a argument with a friend, I really hate not talking with someone, and even if I feel they should be the one to apologize somehow I always end up texting/calling first, its like something I see as weak in myself, but at the same time I thank Allah for this, so guess what I did after jumah? I texted the girl who in my opnion was suppose to call back because she told me two days before that when I called to speak about the issue we were arguing about she said "Leave me alone, I dont wana talk now, im busy, ill talk to you later".

 One thing that gets me upset is these words, "Leave me alone" because isolation from the problem is never the solution and "Im busy" because this is just a rude way of saying yah I dont wana talk to you.

She never called back, and I thought to myself "I will not call bak!" but humdallah for this lecture which made me realize the importance of ihsan, it was truly a "private message from Allah" for me to turn back and contact this person.

I texted her the following :

" Three things are noble acts for this world and the hereafter: forgiving one who has oppressed you, joining one who has cut off from you, and being patient when you are treated out of ignorance"

Humdalllh she answered like two minutes later, and as a joke I asked if she was waiting for the three day period to contact me again, she said she was going to text me today after work.

One quote I wrote when I was upset, was this

"No matter what you do people never change and they keep on repeating the same mistakes, but that is why I must remind myself that only Allah is perfect and that the Prophet always forgave"

And my other message from Allah today, again answering my feelings was one I came across from Yasmin Moghed she writes,

"I'm sitting at the airport, waiting to board, en route to the holiest place on earth. Parting advice to you and myself:

Let go of your grudges. Let the bitterness die tonight. Make a decision today that it's time to move on. And begin again. New, this time. Never forget that what has passed you by was never meant to befall you. And what has befallen you, was never meant to pass you by. Know that sometimes Allah withholds from you, in order to give you something better. Keep your heart focused on Him, and He will take care of the rest. And remember: you will stumble, but that’s part of the path. Keep going. Keep rising, and refuse to give up."

Gratitude to Allah & Others

Gratitude is an important charcterstic of the Muslim , even Allah SWT constantly mentions in that Quran that

It is Allah who made for you the night that you may rest therein and the day giving sight. Indeed, Allah is full of bounty to the people, but most of the peoplearenot grateful.-Holy Quran 40:61

...most surely Allah is Gracious to people, but most people are not grateful.

-Holy Quran 2:243

How  do you expect people to be grateful to you as a person, when they have not been grateful to Allah?Subhnallah interesting, I love how the Quran has a example to everything

And indeed We have put forth every kind of example in this Quran, for mankind. But, man is ever more quarrelsome than anything.

-Surat AlKhaf :54

So dont worry when people are not grateful to you, but dont ever forget to be grateful to Allah...but dont forget what the Prophet taught,

"Whoever doesnt thank the people, does not thank Allah"

Two Cermonies Today-Inspiration

Today  I attended two inspiring events. I attended the NJIT Graduation, which made me proud to see lots of Hijabis, and Muslim Male names on the list, and then my own Honors Induction Cermony, where I was the only hijabi out of like 60 students.

I gotta admit two ceremonies in one day is alot! I dont suggest it, lol...

I think this post goes along with the post before this about my academic/career goals..The field I want to enter- Higher Education Administration, is lacking in Muslims, especially Hijabis...

I have a goal that inshallah one day students will award me a reward similar to this one:

This whole ceremony was based on the "Soceity of Leadership and Success" which helped us develop goals and strategies to achieve our goals, and stregthen our leadership skills. It was helpful, but I prefer Eslam Faymoui style strategies lol

My Personal Dunya Goals: E.ElFaymoui Lecture Notes

Theres nothing wrong with having success in this dunya... I have some goals I want to achieve Inshallah..I will do this through aslasbab-effort and tawkul-trust in Allah

Eslam Elfayhoumis lecture was about this topic : Trusting in Allah but also putting effort
he said,

"Pre-requisites to get the help of Allah you have to put effort first"

Do everything in your power to get what you seek, if you prepare correctly you will get it.

If you want something good in this dunya then put forth towards it.

Istkhara is a form of tawkal, you dont pray it with doubts.

Tawkal is not the idea of giving up, it is a proactive attuide. It is the attuide of 'Il will go full esteem ahaed and I will not worry.

Takwal is you push forward all you have and if there are roadblocks dont worry. Allah opens up the way for those who have yaqn (Certanity).


As Allah is guiding you He will give you sighns, these signns will boost the feeling of "Tamata Alqulb" (the aya that only in the remembrance of Allah will the hearts find rest). This feeling will only be given to those who have tawkul and yaqyn..

Everything is possible but you have to put effort just like Mariam when she shook the tree!

I also heard at another lecture that "Whatever you intend Allah will give you that which you intended"Subhanllah...so it all begins with YOU.


My thoughts...
First off I love the aya, about "Alaa badhhikr Allah tatamat al qulb" as I mentioned in other posts, and I even have a posting of that aya. I always wondered what is needed to get to this beautiful state of mind, so this part of the  lecture gave me a great feeling of excitement. Inshallah we are all close or already in this state.

I think one of the best ways to achieve your goals is to actually write them and plan them, but keep in mind Allah is the best of planners, so you can plan one way, but you will get there in another.
Most people think of academic/career goals. Mine is to become a Higher Education Administrator. I want to continue for my masters, and my highest goal is my dr degree...I never really thought of going that far until I wrote this post! Inshallah if Allah wills I can do it, but I also have to put all the efforts necessary and have tawkul..

My Janzah-Prepartion For A Real Event.

People prepare for weddings and hardly ever prepare for funerals -Ammar Poetry

We plan for fairytale weddings, dream jobs, graduation events and our kids names (See post before this), and everything else, but we are not guaranteed any of these moments in life...

One thing we are all guaranteed of is our death; no one cann deny that this event has not been written into thier account.

The title of this post brings lots of fear, but its reality. Subhnallah...

We are sure this day will come but what have we done to prepare? Have we put in the same efforts we put into finding a spouse, or completing a degree?  Have we done all we can so that this will be the most perfect moment in our life, just as we picture our weddings to be ? Or have we simply put this idea aside because its not really something we want to face.

How many people do you plan or did you plan on inviting to your wedding, or your gradution?

 Alot huh?

How many people did you invite to your janzah? When a person dies can they invite you to thier janzah? No right? So how do you get your janzah to have alot of people and blessings? You do indirect invitations when your alive by being kind to everyone, so once you die inshallah you wont need to have invtations, and your janzah will be as full as the eid prayer.Amennn

Plan your janzah as if it is your wedding, because if you do it right, your janzah can also be a form of celbration: A celebration, because you will finally be with Allah...Inshallah!

Do this by alwaiz being in the state of submission...

 O you who have believed, fear Allah as He should be feared and do not die except as Muslims  (in submission to Him).-3:102

I love hearing this duaaa on Quran CD

... . Our Lord! Forgive us our sins and remit from us our evil deeds, and make us die in the state of righteousness along with Al-Abrar (those who are obedient to Allah and follow strictly His Orders). 3:193

Baby Names-From E.Fahymouis Lecture

If Allah gives me kids (inshallah) I want to name them based on the terms I am learning about in Eslam Elfahymouis lecture series...funny huh?

I bet you never heard of a kid named, Yaqyn or Tawkul or Sabr or Shukr!

http://hudawritess.blogspot.com/2012/04/efahyomui-lecture-notes-in-diagrams.html

1. Yaqyn -it means Certainty in the belief in Allah...I always said I would name my kid "Yasin" but yayn is cool and different..hahahaa maybe Ill have twins and I can name them Yasin and Yaqyn..twins do run in my family! My dad was a twin, and my cousins both have twins.

2. Tawakul-  Trust in Allah.. One probelm mothers have which is normal is this constant feeling of fear for thier childern. Tawkul is a essetnatial trait parents need..so call your kid tawkul and you will inshalah always be reminded of tawkul.

3. Shukr-Gratefulness...I can telll my child I am thankful for everything especialy you, and thats why I gave you this name.

4. Sabr- Patience...or Sabrun Jamloun: Beautiful Patience.. because I loveee the aya

Therefore do thou hold Patience,- a Patience of beautiful (contentment).

And my name would go along pretty well with these...

becauseee without Guidance-Huda:

 you cant have Yaqyn,Tawkal,Shukr, and Sabr! Right?

All they need is a baba with a nice first and last name that would fit the pattern.loool

I guess ima have to add "suitable names" to my criteria for suitable spouses

Haha im just kidding

=D

My criteria is as the Prophet advised us "Deen and character" and also this beautiful quote I found yesterday....my favorite part is "and looks after you for your akirkah...I never thought of this and I think its beautiful because in the end you and your spouse should both have one common goal:
Please Allah and enter Jannah toghteher...

"And We said, "O Adam, dwell, you and your wife, in Paradise" 2:35

"There are lots of beautiful and wonderful people in the world. Make sure you have close to you someone who is beautiful and wonderful in their intentions towards you, wanting you to be joyful and successful,  righteous, pious, and looks after you for your Akhirah, who desires that your solutions to love, contentment, success are rooted in that which is good for the soul, pleasing to the One in Who's Hand is your soul, and strives to give you the reminders of that path" - Megan Wyatt

No Clothes,Feelings of Shame:Adam & Eve

We all know about the story of Adam and Eve approaching the tree in Paradise and becoming naked because they weren't supposed to approach the tree..even people of other faiths know this common story. But why did they feel shameful when their private parts became exposed?

During todays lecture I attended, Noman Ali Khan gave us interesting details about this story, he brings Surat Al-Araf to our attention, the story of Adam and Eve and how they had shame because their clothing was removed, and the emphasis of clothing.

He says (not exact)

Allah explains the agenda of the shyatn in tricking Adam and Eve..

"Then Shaitan (Satan) whispered suggestions to them both in order to uncover that which was hidden from them of their private parts (before); he said: "Your Lord did not forbid you this tree save you should become angels or become of the immortals."-7:20

  

The shytans tactic is to get you to sin through a slow process. Just like Adam & Eve, he will come to you multiple times with waswas (his evil whisperings) until he gets you to do the wrong.

So he made them fall, through deception. And when they tasted of the tree, their private parts became apparent to them, and they began to fasten together over themselves from the leaves of Paradise. And their Lord called to them, "Did I not forbid you from that tree and tell you that Satan is to you a clear enemy?" -7:22

Allah  did not teach Adam and Eve the charcstertic of alhaya-modesty or shame...it was naturally instilled in them because as soon as their private parts were exposed they felt shameful and their natural reaction was to cover.

O children of Adam, We have bestowed upon you clothing to conceal your private parts and as adornment. But the clothing of righteousness - that is best. That is from the signs of Allah that perhaps they will remember. 7:26

Allah says in this very aya, the word "Labaas" which means clothing (I never knew that!).

The shyatn doesn't want you to cover, he wants you to be shameless, and naked.  The shyatns attack of shame is what he started as the door to all evils. When shame is gone, evils come.

Make a connection to today's largest industry:pronography

Who makes up pronography ? Shameless naked people.

What does pronography lead to? You can answer that yourself.

O children of Adam, We have bestowed upon you clothing to conceal your private parts and as adornment. But the clothing of righteousness - that is best. That is from the signs of Allah that perhaps they will remember. 7:26

There are two types of clothing :you have to wear clothing, and clothing of "tawaqa-righteousness which Allah descirbes as the best. Once we lose our clothes, haram-disobedience begins to occur.

Shytans attack of shame was the start of evil. The lose of shame opens the doors to evil.

O Children of Adam! Let not Shaitan (Satan) deceive you, as he got your parents [Adam and Hawwa (Eve)] out of Paradise, stripping them of their raiments (clothing), to show them their private parts. Verily, he and his tribe see you from where you cannot see them. Verily, We made the Shayatin (devils) Auliya' (protectors and helpers) for those who believe not. 7:27

Allah is warning us not to fall into the same trap as our parents-Adam and Eve.

The surah continues to talk about how we should dress. There are many parts of the dress descried including, cleanliness, and simplicity-not excessive.

O Children of Adam! wear your beautiful apparel at every time and place of prayer: eat and drink: But waste not by excess, for Allah loveth not the wasters. 7:31

Read more of the surah..http://quran.com/7

Also while I writes this on the Iqraa channel the show Ask Me  A question is on and someone asked how should we dress in non-Arab Countries. The sheikh basically said we must wear clothing that is culturally acceptable in the country you live in. You dont have to make yourself stand out in a weird way, you can be conservative and still dress in a way that is acceptable where you live.For an example when you go to Madinah, the male will dress in the white thowb,it would be werid to wear jeans. Or in Africa if you dress in all black, it would be werid, because they wear bright colors, but in Dubai women will wear all black abaya and it is the cultural norm. In America you also dress in a way which is accepted, but dont forget Islamic teachings.  He said sisters can wear jeans but he emphasize lose, and he says it twice.

Heart Trembling Statement

Everytime I read this it gives me the shivers, but in a good way...great reminder! (I forgot the source, I just have written in my phone as a note).

How often is it that you disobey Me and how often I conceal your deeds and I do not expose you?

 How often I seek heartfelt tears from you borne out of fear and awe and yet your eyes remain dry?

How often I seek you to connect to Me through disobedience yet you turn away and distance yourself?

 How many blessings have I bestowed upon  you and you have yet to be thankful?

Muslim in America-A Blessing

 Does living in America prevent a Muslim from praying the five prayers on time?

Does living in a Muslim country promote a Muslim to pray all thier five prayers on time?

Do these two different environments really affect the way a Muslim acts?

 And from wherever you go out [for prayer], turn your face toward al-Masjid al-Haram. And wherever you [believers] may be, turn your faces toward it in order that the people will not have any argument against you, except for those of them who commit wrong; so fear them not but fear Me.And [it is] so I may complete

My favor upon you and that you may be guided.

-Holy Quran 2:150

American Muslims have this false thought that they cannot be good Muslims due to all of this fitnah and bad environment they are living in.

Turn this thought around,and look at living in America as a blessing because every time you step out of that door you are given a chance to make dawah

Let me ask you this, are the Muslims who live in Arab/Muslim countries good Muslims because they live in a proclaimed "good" Muslim environment?

 

 

Is this the state of mind we should live in?

 

 

Dont make your environment as an excuse,there is nothing to blame expect for your own self.

 

 

An environment cannot promote or prevent a person from doing something excpet thier own will.

Everytime you have to struggle to find a place to pray Allah only
increaes you for your efforts(inshalah)

Man prays in NYC subway Mashllah

If the American-Muslim wants to pray their five prayers on a time, no matter what the circumstances is they will do it, trust me, I know people who are doing it right now. No matter where they are weather its at the workplace amongst non-Muslim coworkers, or in the University amongst the non-Muslim classmates, or amongst shoppers in the shopping mall , if the determination to pray is set in the persons mind they will pray.

Upon various vists to the Middle East, I noticed (and my friends also noticed this), the call to prayer is not always answered even though you will hear almost five adhans at the same time. These Muslims will hear these five adhans and still not get up, is this not true? Btw I am not critzing but I am trying to make a point that your environment doesnt change who you are if you dont allow it to.

Dont ever be worried about  the non-Muslims looking at you in a odd way, because you putting your foot in that sink for wudu can be the opportunity to introduce Islam. Or you asking your boss at work for a place to pray can be a chance to dialogue about Islam.

 If you are shopping at the mall and you want to pray, dont think oh where am I going to pray?

 Rather try your best to make the prayer and Allah will assit you.

One example: praying in the fitting room..or simply ask "Hey do you have a room I can pray in"?

E.Fahymoui-Tawkal Trust in Allah

Todays lecture was focused on the concept of "Tawkal" or trust in Allah.

It is the third fruit of yaqyn-certinaity (see other posts).

Tawkal is an action of the heart, do what you can (means), put your trust in Allah and dont feel worried.

The definition of tawkal in Arabic is depenidng on someone other then yourself. Islamicly it is defined by Ibn Rajab as " Depedning on Allah with your heart, in the seeking of befincial things for yourselves, and pushing away bad things from yourself."

This means, when I dont get what I want or when I cant push away what I dont like, I dont become depressed because I have tawkal.

When you dont have a proper understanding of tawkal, you will feel anxious, worried and depressed. Tawkal can only come with true yaqyn-certinaity in the beleif of Allah. Tawkal is a sign of eman-faith.

An example of not having tawkal is:

You dont pray at your job because of fear of losing your job. If you dont pray then it means you dont have tawkal in Allah who is truly the provider. You think your boss is provding you with the check, but its from Allahs rizik. You say, I will not pray because I am at work, but the money is already there, so you lose the barkah. Anything you gain during that time (which you shouldve prayed in) it is cursed.

An example of having tawkal is:

You study hard for your test= you exahust all your means, and then you depend on Allah. You dont miss jumaah because you want to study for your test, because you have tawkal.

Another example of tawkal is:

People always ask about marriage. When you pray istghara, you should feel sakinah-peace if the decision is a yes. You dont have to double check or ask your freinds to make sure it is the right choice because you are under the protection of Allah. You have tawkal in Him alone. Even if there are roadblocks, you keep trying,  contunie having tawkal, and relax.  Why are you so worried if you have tawkal? You should know that Allah has answered your istghara.

Takwal doesnt come from your salat isghara it comes from your heart. The true mumen is making tawkal constnatly even if they didnt make the prayer, because they always rember Allah, and they always ask for Allahs help through duaa.

The beleivers trust in Allah is mentioned 7 times in the Quran,

Allah says,

" And in Allah should the believers put their trust" 3:122

"And in Allah (Alone) let believers put their trust" 3:160

"And in Allah let the believers put their trust" 9:51

The critiera for belief or being a beleiver is having tawkal...

 Overall, the concept of Tawkal is mentioned many more times in the Quran...

What will those who make tawakal recieve?

Allah says,

"And put your trust in Allah, and Sufficient is Allah as a Wakil -Trustee, or Disposer of affairs" 33:3

Allah asks the rhetorical question: "Is Allah not sufficient enough for His servants?"

The Prophet says: If you depend on Allah, with the true tawkal, He will give you from His bounty the way he gives the birds.

What does the Prophet mean by birds?

Have you ever seen a depressed bird? There are no depressed, or anxisous birds. They leave early in the moring and return late with food.

Rizq is not just in the form of money, it is other things also.

Why would you ask and worry about tommorows rizk if Allah still hasnt asked you about tomorow? Tommorow is not gurnateed.